It has not been a great week.  We have had meltdown after meltdown and now it’s starting to take it’s toll.  It’s great if you can identify triggers and plan for them but what can you do when you have no idea what is going to happen?

It started on Friday, Jamie was going to a friends house and when I went to drop her round their toilet was blocked.  Jamie could still stay and play but wouldn’t be able to use the toilet. Unfortunately Jamie is the kind of child that is on and off the loo like a yoyo.  The meltdown was immediate and was basically lots of growling and kicking me.  While Jamie was going to be at her friends I had planned to take Joe for a haircut and immediately decided against it as Jamie would be with us, but she knew what was planned and without even asking if she had to go to the hairdressers (and finding the answer to be NO) she went into meltdown.  More growling and kicking.

Saturday was the release of Pokemon X & Y and then onto a little girls party.  Getting the game was easy but the minute we arrived at the party her hands went to her ears and she hid behind me.  I took her away from the noise and explained that I would just tell the girls mum that we wouldn’t be able to stay and bam, hit, kicked, bitten.  I can’t even begin to imagine what must be going through her head at the point of a meltdown because the amount of force behind the bite was unreal.  Pain surged up and down my arm.  She would never knowingly do that to anyone and with so much force it is quite scary.  Add in another set of broken headphones to this meltdown and I had a very stressed out child.  Joe was very disturbed by all of this and later told me he doesn’t know what to do when Jamie kicks off because he hates to see her hurting his mam 😦 I managed to get her in the car but there was no calming her down as she said she was “evil” and she didn’t deserve to do or have anything.  Luckily the journey to PC World for another set of headphones calmed her down.

Sunday she was generally miserable and one of those days when you’re walking on egg shells.  But that evening she did not sleep – again!!! 6am Monday morning was when she eventually drifted off.  That left me with the dilemma of getting Joe to school when she was asleep??? Unfortunately he had to go in late.  So unfair on the poor fella.  When she woke she screamed and screamed that she didn’t feel right.  Nothing I did helped to calm her, not even cuddling the dog worked, so we had to ride that one out.

Again she didn’t sleep well last night (i’m not sure the melatonin is working now) she ended up in with her dad and I went in with Joe.  She woke up in complete meltdown because she didn’t want to leave the house, I did give in and say she could go to grandma while I took Joe to school but what would I do another time with no one to rely on? She needs to know that on a school morning her brother has to be at school – on time!! So I made her come with us.  Unfortunately with things being so stressed this morning Joe went in looking like the Gruffalo and it’s picture day 😦

Tomorrow is her 10th Birthday and it could go either way.  I am totally dreading it.  Joe asked if we could have a chocolate cake (Jamie hates cake), anyway I explained that it would be nice for her to blow the candles out and for others to have some cake even if she doesn’t have any.  So we went to Morrison’ s and bought a “stupid freaking chocolate cake”.

So here’s hoping tomorrow goes well and Thursday as schools are on strike we are taking her and her friends horseriding and for lunch.


Does anyone else have peaks and troughs with their ASD kids? We go through some wonderful periods and then some awful one’s.  I really hope this one doesn’t last too much longer cos i’m sat here and could quite easily cry x


2 thoughts on “Meltdowns

  1. I know just how you feel! we had a brilliant month and the last week has been unbearable just had an amazing melt down at the genetics counsellor because of blood test sometimes he sits there and watches them do it no probs other days like today screams like a banshee hits kicks spits growls and make amazing use of the f word which he never ever uses any other time. No idea why its different every time. Also three days ago his melt down head banging finally brought down the plaster on his bedroom wall. He is 8, i have no idea what i am going to do as he gets older, his strength is almost matching my own. Just keep clinging to the idea that once we get a diagnosis something might be easier. The ed psych told school to do what i tell them to i know him well and since they did we have been almost problem free at school. But what am i supposed to do when mum doesn’t know? Lets hope its a phase that passes quickly maybe the weather change maybe the good spells lull us into a false sense of security. But at least things have to get better!!!! xx

    • Jamie is 10 tomorrow and I feel lucky that she is a girl, but I am 5 ft and she is almost as tall as me so it wont be long before she can overpower me.

      That’s great that school are listening to you and it’s going well. I think deep down you will always know what to do with your own child. It’s just these occasions where we don’t know the triggers or don’t expect them that are hard to manage.

      I know what you mean about being lulled into a false sense of security. Things do get better with a diagnosis (I have found) it opens more doors for more help. As for head banging, so frustrating, Jamie hasn’t done it since I started Home Educating (apart from at a christening) but she used to make a real mess of her head and no matter what you say it makes no difference.

      And when all else fails there is always wine!! lol

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